Atheist Loneliness

I’m tired of being alone
I’ve been alone for so long
And when I finally found someone
It turned out to be my reflection

So I thought I had people
People who would never leave
But this train doesn’t stop
It comes by and takes them away

I thought I was fine
There were no defects, no lies
But that in itself was a lie
And it only hurt me more

Knowing I’ve been living
With myself and no one else
The reality hurts, but it’s necessary
So now I need to go

Find someone, at least something
Religion?
Religion…
I’m sick of receiving a title by it

I feel myself parting
From that lifestyle
I find myself drifting
To the sin

Scared, I just take a taste
But that’s all it takes
To suck you in
To keep you trapped

To keep your life in guilt
In a despair, in a feeling
Of depression, of hopelessness
Religion? It hurts

But so does life
And if reality hurts
Then religion is nothing but reality
Take His love

As for me
I have to fix myself
I’ve asked for help
But it’s been like talking to no one

So religion?
It’s gone for a couple days
But I still guard my mind
Careful not to turn to my reflection

Yet again

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This was inspired by pure desire to just write a poem. We had a substitute in Social Studies class and no one was doing what they were supposed to do, and sooner or later we had free time. I just sat there, listening to John Mayer, and decided to write SOMETHING. This was the day after I wrote "These Tears", and on my blog I said that this poem is "a pretty good description of wut i was feeling last nite, after the lights were turned off and I was in bed, trying to sleep." The first title I gave this poem was "My Reflection," but I changed it later on.